This book is small, but mighty. If you were involved in a pathological relationship -- or you want to prevent it from happening in the first place -- this book is for you. It gets to the heart of the matter of personal boundaries. Identifying and setting clear boundaries is vital for survivors and for anyone who wants to become more confident, improve relationships, and prevent victimization. When you create boundaries you take a stand for yourself and your life, and you communicate your worth to others in a real and practical way. This concise and powerful book is filled with practical wisdom and useful tips. It will walk you through the process of creating boundaries from start to finish. You get to decide how you want to live. Find your courage. Live in an authentic way. Protect yourself and what's important to you. Gain self respect and the respect of others. Boundaries will help you do all of these things. "The BEST Manual on how to protect yourself from becoming a victim again - I know the subject too well... I am going to recommend it to the facilitators in the divorce support group I am attending." "This small book was full of tons of useful information. I don't usually write in my books, but my copy of Boundaries has underlining on almost every page. I was really glad I bought it." "Excellent Book for Individual, Group or Use in Therapy. A very well written book by an author who has a firm grip on abusers and their cunning ways. Excellent description on what boundaries are, why they are needed and what they can do for the holder of the newly created list of personal boundaries. This book if studied and put into practice could protect many from the narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths in all areas of one's life. It would lend exceptional protection in the area of dating. It would protect a person from repeating the selection of another abuser if a past relationship was abusive. Highly recommend!" "Super Helpful: Make And Keep Your Boundaries.This is a really well written book. I found her tips for discovering, recording and keeping your personal boundaries extremely helpful." "My eyes have seen the light. How I wish I would have read this book years ago." "Worth your time! Well written, clear, and concise. So thankful I came across this quick, but powerful read. Having separated myself from an 8 year long destructive marriage, and reading many, many books on the topic, I so appreciate the wisdom I found in this writing. I feel empowered once more! Easily rated at 5 stars."
Author: A. B. Admin
Release Date: 2014-09-13
Boundaries: Loving Again After a Pathological Relationship, from the author of the book and website Psychopaths and Love Were you involved with a psychopath or other manipulator or abuser? Are you thinking about taking another chance at love? This is the book for you. It gets to the heart of the matter of boundaries for survivors of pathological relationships. When you create boundaries you take a stand for yourself and your life, and communicate your worth to others in a real and practical way. This short book is filled with practical wisdom and useful tips. It will walk you through the process of creating boundaries from start to finish. Find your courage. Love yourself enough to live in an authentic way. Stop caring so much what everybody else thinks of you, and start caring about what you think of you.
[Now includes a 14-page excerpt from Zari Ballard's new book Stop Spinning, Start Breathing] When our committed relationship involves a narcissistic partner or someone with a narcissistic personality disorder, it is inevitable that the experience, at some point, will take a very dark turn. Pathological liars, chronic cheaters, and masters at passive-aggressive punishments (i.e. the silent treatment), narcissists follow a specific relationship agenda where every deceptive move is deliberately calculated to confuse and abuse the people who love them. And, as crazy as it appears, those who love the narcissist will stick it out, thinking they can fix this person or love them out of their bad behavior...but the truth is that neither is possible. Narcissists, psychopaths, and sociopaths can never be fixed - not with love, therapy, and not with any magic pill. I know...because I stumbled down this very path for twelve long years. Do the behaviors of your partner continually cause you to feel suspicious? Are you subjected to silent treatments and other forms of controlling punishments? Do you find yourself choosing to overlook these behaviors rather than face a confrontation? Does your partner appear to create chaos just to keep you feeling anxious and insecure? Are you obsessed with trying to figure it all out? Answering "yes" to any of the above indicates that you may be involved with a narcissistic partner...a person without a conscience...a pretender...someone who is manipulating your life to suit his own purpose. You may even feel an agonizing codependency - not only to the narcissist but to the drama itself - and this, too, is an intention of the narcissist's pathological relationship agenda. When Love Is a Lie is a personal, non-clinical narrative that exposes the typical manipulative behavioral patterns of narcissistic partners. Based on my own 12-year experience, this book deliberately offers no excuses for narcissism (medical or otherwise) nor does it encourage readers to cut a narcissistic partner any slack whatsoever. This book is about the reality of the situation, about why we become codependent to the drama, and, most importantly, what we can do about all of it to save our own lives. Learn how/why a lover or partner with a narcissistic personality... can never have - or even pretend to have - the love-worthy human qualities (the undeniable truths!) that make up the beauty of life. can - and probably has - deliberately and methodically managed down your relationship expectations so that you expect less and he gets away with more will use the Silent Treatment and similar demoralizing methods of control to punish those who dare to call him out on questionable behaviors will create chaos even during "good" times as a tactic for keeping you in a constant state of codependent anxiety will juggle many relationships at once and often for years with no one being the wiser...not even you lies even when the truth is a better story Realizing the truth about your narcissistic partner is never easy but it's not the end of the world. Use this book to separate yourself from the narcissistic drama once and for all. **Scroll to the top to order** **Click image at top to Look Inside this book**
Author: Anne Katherine
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Release Date: 2010-12-21
Genre: Family & Relationships
For those of us who have walked away from a conversation, meeting, or visit feeling violated and not understanding why, this book helps us recognize and set healthy boundaries. Boundaries bring order to our lives, strengthen our relationships with others and ourselves, and are essential to our mental and physical health. For those of us who have walked away from a conversation, meeting, or visit feeling violated and not understanding why, this book helps us recognize and set healthy boundaries. Real-life stories illustrate the ill effects of not setting limits and the benefits gained by respecting our own boundaries and those of others.
Learn the manipulator's game, so they can't play it with you. Identifying covert emotional manipulation is tricky. You sense something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on the problem. This powerful book will reveal to you if manipulation is at play in your relationships. It will open your eyes. You will learn thirty tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You will also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used. This book is geared toward romantic relationships, including those involving a pathological partner. Even so, many of the manipulation tactics are the same as those used by family members, coworkers, friends and others. Covert emotional manipulation tactics are underhanded methods of control. Emotional manipulation methodically wears down your self-worth and damages your trust in your own perceptions. It can make you unwittingly compromise your personal boundaries and lose your self-respect, and even lead to a warped concept of yourself and of reality. With your defenses weakened or completely disarmed in this manner, you are left even more vulnerable to further manipulation and psychological harm. Empower yourself and get your life back! "An excellent and concise guide to emotional abuse. Here is a concise listing with well written descriptions of each method and tactic of emotional abusers. In my opinion everyone should read this book. Forewarned is forearmed." "Clear, concise, accurate portrayal of complex subject matter impacting many people. I appreciate the accessibility to the general public of a topic that is often overlooked, but impacts morale not only in romantic relationships, but in the family, at work and in myriad social situations." "Wow. What a sap I've been. I've been victimized by a control freak domineering wife for nearly 30 years. I knew I was passive but I had no idea how cutthroat she really was. Very eye opening." "This author nails it. Some examples were direct quotes from people I know, so I know I am not alone in having been manipulated. It is directly applicable to my life and gives excellent guidance for how to recognize and therefore avoid manipulations in the future. I am recommending it to a number of my friends." "At first I thought this was another of those "little books" with no content. I went ahead and got it anyway. Immediately I realized I was wrong. Good choice." "Knowing the tactics made me far less emotional about what has been happening, better able to deal with the manipulation. Consequently, I look less crazy, I count that as a win!" "BRAVO! Everyone should read this... if you're in a controlling relationship, man or woman, this will help you spell it out. Don't let these people in at ANY cost..it's not worth your LIFE" "Short and right to the point. Worth re-reading and, because of the format, it was easy to locate points that I wanted to find again. This book provides instant clarity." "Must read for anyone who interacts with other people, ever! VERY useful information everyone should be aware of!" "Great! This is one of those great little book that you come across once in a while. The book is short because it left all the bulls*** and fillers out!" "Excellent! A must read for anyone that is lost in a relationship. I would like to thank the author for an eye opening experience! This book has clarified more for me than I have ever understood in my entire life time. "Impressive! Short, direct, and thought-provoking. I only wish I had read it years ago! Every young person should read this before dating!" "If you're wondering . . . "gee, should I read this book?" The answer is YES.It should be required for every human adult's relationship toolkit."
Author: Patrick Carnes, Ph.D.
Publisher: Health Communications, Inc.
Release Date: 2010-01-01
Genre: Family & Relationships
Exploitive relationships can create trauma bonds--chains that link a victim to someone who is dangerous to them. Divorce, employee relations, litigation of any type, incest and child abuse, family and marital systems, domestic violence, hostage negotiations, kidnapping, professional exploitation and religious abuse are all areas of trauma bonding. All these relationships share one thing: they are situations of incredible intensity or importance where there is an exploitation of trust or power. In The Betrayal Bond Patrick Carnes presents an in-depth study of these relationships, why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. He shows how to recognize when traumatic bonding has occurred and gives a checklist for examining relationships. He then provides steps to safely extricate from these relationships. This is a book you will turn to again and again for inspiration and insight, while professionals will find it an invaluable reference work.
Boundaries And How To Say NO! 2nd Edition Boundaries for nice people. When nice people are asked to do things, those who feel insecure may be tempted to say "yes" more often than not. They need to create reasonable boundaries that allow a certain element of personal freedom of choice. Without these boundaries, what tends to happen is that others use nice people as "doormats." It's a fact of life that there are givers and takers that make up the human race. Givers are those who tend to put other people's needs before their own. Takers are those who profit from the generosity of kind people. Although giving is a very positive experience when in proportion to the give and take nature of a relationship, it becomes negative when nice people are pushed beyond acceptable limits and find themselves unable to say "no." This book covers the topic and gives demonstration to help those who find themselves in the unfortunate position of being constantly used.
Author: Henry Cloud
Release Date: 2001-03
Genre: Family & Relationships
All the immense value of the book is available in this participant's guide for groups of any size. It will encourage spiritual and emotional growth and character development that enables dating--within God's boundaries--to be fun, spiritually fulfilling, and growth producing.
How do you know you’re ready to trust again ... and what does it take to be ready? Painful relationships violate our trust, causing us to close our hearts. But to experience the freedom and love God designed us for, we eventually have to take another risk. In this breakthrough book, bestselling author Dr. John Townsend takes you beyond the pain of the past to discover how to re-enter a life of intimate relationships. Whether you’re trying to restore a current relationship or begin a new one, Townsend gives practical tools for establishing trust and finding the intimacy you long for. Beyond Boundaries will help you reinstate closeness with someone who broke your trust; discern when true change has occurred; reestablish appropriate connections in strained relationships; create a safe environment that helps you trust; and restore former relationships to a healthy dynamic. You can move past relational pain to trust again. Beyond Boundaries will show you how.
Author: Jackson MacKenzie
Release Date: 2015-09-01
Genre: Family & Relationships
Have you ever been in a relationship with a psychopath? Chances are, even if you did, you would never know it. Psychopaths are cunning charmers and master manipulators, to the point where you start to accept the most extreme behaviors as normal… Even if it hurts you. All around us, every single day, human beings devoid of empathy are wreaking havoc and destroying lives in the coldest, most heartless ways imaginable. In constant pursuit of money, sex, influence, or simple entertainment, psychopaths will do whatever it takes to gain power over others. They hide behind a veil of normalcy, arranging their friends and partners like pawns in a game of chess. Using false praise and flattery to get what they want, they can lure any unsuspecting target into a relationship. Once hooked, their charming promises spin into mind games and psychological torture. Victims are left devastated and confused, unable to recognize—or even put into words—the nightmare that just took place. This significantly expanded edition of Psychopath Free contains new chapters, updated content, and real survivor experiences. Written from the heart, it is the first guide for survivors written by a survivor, offering hope for healing and thriving after psychopathic abuse. Say goodbye to the chaos, self-doubt, and victimization. You are free. From the Trade Paperback edition.
Author: Anne Katherine
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Release Date: 2012-09-25
From the acclaimed author of the perennial favorite Boundaries, Where to Draw the Line is a practical guide to establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries in many different situations. With every encounter, we either demonstrate that we’ll protect what we value or that we’ll give ourselves away. Healthy boundaries preserve our integrity. Unlike defenses, which isolate us from our true selves and from those we love, boundaries filter out harm. This book provides the tools and insights needed to create boundaries so that we can allow time and energy for the things that matter—and helps break down limiting defenses that stunt personal growth. Focusing on every facet of daily life—from friendships and sexual relationships to dress and appearance to money, food, and psychotherapy—Katherine presents case studies highlighting the ways in which individuals violate their own boundaries or let other people breach them. Using real-life examples, from self-sacrificing mothers to obsessive neat freaks, she offers specific advice on making choices that balance one’s own needs with the needs of others. Boundaries are the unseen structures that support healthy, productive lives. Where to Draw the Line shows readers how to strengthen them and hold them in place every day.
Invisibility is the most disturbing aspect of psychopathy. Psychopaths must keep their true nature hidden, and they know how to do it. They're skilled actors and mimics. After all, they can only dupe us if they can first make us believe they're honest, genuine and trustworthy. To do that, they have to come across as normal. Is it possible to identify a psychopath? Yes, if you learn the signs that can help you spot one. From the author of the unique and popular website, Psychopaths and Love. "Wonderful read. Such a great gem. One of my favorite books about this subject as the author paints such a clear picture of what these relationships are like. If you're wondering if you are encountering a psychopath, read this book and you will know without a doubt." "Great book. This book is clear about what one may experience with a psychopath. This may help those who struggle with understanding why their "soul mate" who shared such an amazing life could simply walk away or be abusive." "The truth shall make you free. The description of typical behavior and common reaction to that behavior was more helpful to me in freeing myself than all the books on what a psychopath, sociopath or narcissist is. Who cares about definitions and diagnosis when it is the behavior that is killing you and is so well hidden from others that you look (and often feel) like the "crazy person" when in reality you are the "sacrificial lamb" of a crazy person."
Dating After Trauma teaches readers how to date again after being raped or experiencing an abusive relationship. Dating after rape, date rape, or an abusive relationship presents unique challenges as most survivors experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) which alters their perception of the world and makes it more difficult to develop relationships, build trust and experience intimacy. It takes tremendous courage to date after suffering an abusive relationship or sexual trauma. It can be even more difficult to be open to love from a good person without experiencing fear. However, once you know what to look for in terms of roadblocks, the path to love becomes much easier. In "Dating after Trauma" Emily Avagliano discusses the common obstacles abuse victims have when trying to find love. Her story is based on her own personal struggle to overcome past trauma and find her soulmate. Through this insight, she provides a methodology for dating that builds trust and intimacy in a safe and healthy way. She can help you let go of your fear and date in a manner that love becomes possible. For rape victims, if you have experienced date rape or sexual abuse, and want to reclaim your sexuality, find your soul mate, or just start feeling again, this book guides you through that process of healing. If someone you love has been raped, you see them suffering, and don't know how to help them move on from the past, this book will help. If you are a mother, father, friend, boyfriend or dating partner, this book explains what rape victims feel and why it is so hard for them to trust and love someone new. This book also tackles the pain of abusive relationships. If you have experienced the roller coaster of an abusive partner where some days he is the best person in the world and other days you can't understand his anger, this book will help you heal. If you have altered your behavior to try to control your partner's anger, jealousy, or even violent physical outburst, this book is for you. If your partner used name calling, controlling behavior, restricted your clothing choices, verbally intimidated you, or made you feel less than, read this book. If you are a parent, partner, or want to help someone in an abusive relationship but don't know how, this book provides insight into ending the cycle of dating abusive partners. Thank you for your feedback. I greatly appreciate a book review on amazon below.
Author: Ross A. Rosenberg
Publisher: PESI Publishing & Media
Release Date: 2013-04-01
"Born in the cauldron of personal experience of suffering and healing and honed through years of professional experience, this book will help anyone understand the attractors of love and consequent suffering. I recommend it to couples who are mystified by the depth and repitition of their pain and joy and to therapists whose destiny is to help them." ~ Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., co-author with Helen LaKelly Hunt of Making Marriage Simple: Transform the Relationship you Have Into the Relationship you Want Since the dawn of civilization, men and women have been magnetically and irresistibly drawn together into romantic relationships, not so much by what they see, feel and think, but more by invisible forces. When individuals with healthy emotional backgrounds meet, the irresistible “love force” creates a sustainable, reciprocal and stable relationship. Codependents and emotional manipulators are similarly enveloped in a seductive dreamlike state; however, it will later unfold into a painful “seesaw” of love, pain, hope and disappointment. The soul mate of the codependent’s dreams will become the emotional manipulator of their nightmares. Readers of the Human Magnet Syndrome will better understand why they, despite their dreams for true love, find themselves hopelessly and painfully in love with partners who hurt them. This book will guide and inspire both the layman and the professional.