Disorder in the Court Great Fractured Moments in Courtroom History

Author: Charles M. Sevilla
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393075516
Release Date: 1999-08-17
Genre: Humor

In America's courtooms, the verdict is laughter. Sit back and enjoy a collection of verbatim exchanges from the halls of justice, where defendants and plaintiffs, lawyers and witnesses, juries and judges, collide to produce memorably insane comedy. A: You mumbled on the first part of that and I couldn't understand what you were saying. Could you repeat the question? Q: I mumbled, did I? Well, we'll just ask the court reporter to read back what I said. She didn't indicate any problem understanding what I said, so obviously she understood every word. We'll just have her read my question back and find out if there was any mumbling going on. Madam reporter, would you be so kind? Court Reporter: Mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble, mumble.

Disorder in the American Courts

Author: Marcelle Boren
ISBN: 0692676643
Release Date: 2016-04-27

The quotes contained in this book are things real people actually said, word for word, under oath in legal court proceedings and are forever immortalized in the public record. This fully illustrated, cartoon panel book brings these humorous quotes to life! It is true that lawyers and witnesses say the darndest things! Please enjoy a good laugh at their expense.

Law and Disorder Absurdly Funny Moments from the Courts

Author: Charles M. Sevilla
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 9780393349542
Release Date: 2014-08-04
Genre: Humor

More hilarious, unbelievable-but-true stories from our nation’s courts, from the author of Disorder in the Court and Disorderly Conduct. Charles M. Sevilla finds comic gems in court transcripts—and now brings readers a delightful, all-new collection. Starting with a chapter on the defendants (one of whom, when asked his marital status, replies after a long pause, "Adequate") and following with sections on lawyers, experts, witnesses, evidence, and even one called "Malaprops" (DA: The status of the boat has no relevance to this case at all. This is a total fishing expedition). Stories from Sevilla's previous books have become viral Internet sensations, priming readers for more legal disorder, such as: Clerk: Do you solemnly swear that the testimony you are about to given in the cause now pending before this court shall be the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God? Witness: Yes, I swear. I’ll say anything but the truth, nothing but the truth.

Disorderly Conduct

Author: Rodney R. Jones
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
ISBN: 0393319261
Release Date: 1999-07-01
Genre: Humor

Gathers unintentionally humorous testimony from actual trials, including remarks by jurors, defendants, lawyers, and judges

I Am Woman I Am Invincible I Am Tired

Author: Peter Pauper Press
Publisher: Peter Pauper Press, Inc.
ISBN: 1593599331
Release Date: 2006-02-01
Genre: Humor

Everyday life may be rife with challenges for the modern woman, but she prevails with her hip humor and sassy sentiments. We may be invincible, but we are also tired; we may be quirky and stressed, but we also know how to live and love large, with attitude. Here is a book that celebrates you in all your outrageous glory.

I Hate Penn State

Author: Paul Finebaum
Publisher: Crane Hill Pub
ISBN: 1575871432
Release Date: 1999-01-01
Genre: Humor

Bet you never knew there were so many reasons to hate PENN STATE! You will laugh out loud as Paul Finebaum goes down the list...

Fractured Lands

Author: Scott Anderson
Publisher: Anchor
ISBN: 9780525434443
Release Date: 2017-05-02
Genre: History

From the bestselling author of Lawrence in Arabia, a piercing account of how the contemporary Arab world came to be riven by catastrophe since the 2003 United States invasion of Iraq. In 2011, a series of anti-government uprisings shook the Middle East and North Africa in what would become known as the Arab Spring. Few could predict that these convulsions, initially hailed in the West as a triumph of democracy, would give way to brutal civil war, the terrors of the Islamic State, and a global refugee crisis. But, as New York Times bestselling author Scott Anderson shows, the seeds of catastrophe had been sown long before. In this gripping account, Anderson examines the myriad complex causes of the region’s profound unraveling, tracing the ideological conflicts of the present to their origins in the United States invasion of Iraq in 2003 and beyond. From this investigation emerges a rare view into a land in upheaval through the eyes of six individuals—the matriarch of a dissident Egyptian family; a Libyan Air Force cadet with divided loyalties; a Kurdish physician from a prominent warrior clan; a Syrian university student caught in civil war; an Iraqi activist for women’s rights; and an Iraqi day laborer-turned-ISIS fighter. A probing and insightful work of reportage, Fractured Lands offers a penetrating portrait of the contemporary Arab world and brings the stunning realities of an unprecedented geopolitical tragedy into crystalline focus.

Just Mercy

Author: Bryan Stevenson
Publisher: Spiegel & Grau
ISBN: 9780812994537
Release Date: 2014-10-21
Genre: Law

#1 New York Times Bestseller | Named one of the Best Books of the Year by The New York Times • The Washington Post • The Boston Globe • The Seattle Times • Esquire • Time Winner of the Carnegie Medal for Nonfiction | Winner of the NAACP Image Award for Nonfiction | Winner of a Books for a Better Life Award | Finalist for the Los Angeles Book Prize | Finalist for the Kirkus Reviews Prize | An American Library Association Notable Book A powerful true story about the potential for mercy to redeem us, and a clarion call to fix our broken system of justice—from one of the most brilliant and influential lawyers of our time Bryan Stevenson was a young lawyer when he founded the Equal Justice Initiative, a legal practice dedicated to defending those most desperate and in need: the poor, the wrongly condemned, and women and children trapped in the farthest reaches of our criminal justice system. One of his first cases was that of Walter McMillian, a young man who was sentenced to die for a notorious murder he insisted he didn’t commit. The case drew Bryan into a tangle of conspiracy, political machination, and legal brinksmanship—and transformed his understanding of mercy and justice forever. Just Mercy is at once an unforgettable account of an idealistic, gifted young lawyer’s coming of age, a moving window into the lives of those he has defended, and an inspiring argument for compassion in the pursuit of true justice. Praise for Just Mercy “Every bit as moving as To Kill a Mockingbird, and in some ways more so . . . a searing indictment of American criminal justice and a stirring testament to the salvation that fighting for the vulnerable sometimes yields.”—David Cole, The New York Review of Books “Searing, moving . . . Bryan Stevenson may, indeed, be America’s Mandela.”—Nicholas Kristof, The New York Times “You don’t have to read too long to start cheering for this man. . . . The message of this book . . . is that evil can be overcome, a difference can be made. Just Mercy will make you upset and it will make you hopeful.”—Ted Conover, The New York Times Book Review “Inspiring . . . a work of style, substance and clarity . . . Stevenson is not only a great lawyer, he’s also a gifted writer and storyteller.”—The Washington Post “As deeply moving, poignant and powerful a book as has been, and maybe ever can be, written about the death penalty.”—The Financial Times “Brilliant.”—The Philadelphia Inquirer “Not since Atticus Finch has a fearless and committed lawyer made such a difference in the American South. Though larger than life, Atticus exists only in fiction. Bryan Stevenson, however, is very much alive and doing God’s work fighting for the poor, the oppressed, the voiceless, the vulnerable, the outcast, and those with no hope. Just Mercy is his inspiring and powerful story.”—John Grisham “Bryan Stevenson is one of my personal heroes, perhaps the most inspiring and influential crusader for justice alive today, and Just Mercy is extraordinary. The stories told within these pages hold the potential to transform what we think we mean when we talk about justice.”—Michelle Alexander, author of The New Jim Crow

Gerald s Game

Author: Stephen King
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 9781501141225
Release Date: 2016-01-01
Genre: Fiction

Now a Netflix movie directed by Mike Flanagan (Oculus, Hush) and starring Carla Gugino and Bruce Greenwood. Master storyteller Stephen King presents this classic, terrifying #1 New York Times bestseller. When a game of seduction between a husband and wife ends in death, the nightmare has only begun… “And now the voice which spoke belonged to no one but herself. Oh my God, it said. Oh my God, I am all alone out here. I am all alone.” Once again, Jessie Burlingame has been talked into submitting to her husband Gerald’s kinky sex games—something that she’s frankly had enough of, and they never held much charm for her to begin with. So much for a “romantic getaway” at their secluded summer home. After Jessie is handcuffed to the bedposts—and Gerald crosses a line with his wife—the day ends with deadly consequences. Now Jessie is utterly trapped in an isolated lakeside house that has become her prison—and comes face-to-face with her deepest, darkest fears and memories. Her only company is that of the various voices filling her mind…as well as the shadows of nightfall that may conceal an imagined or very real threat right there with her…

Little Penis A Finger Puppet Parody Book

Author: Craig Yoe
Publisher: Cider Mill Press
ISBN: 1604333081
Release Date: 2013-01-08
Genre: Humor

Meet Little Penis, the cute dinky winky you bring to life when you put your finger in the puppet in this delightfully crass and hilarious parody board book for adults. This board book parodies children’s finger puppet books with its bold colors and simple illustrations, but this book is not for children! Instead, put your finger in the hole in the back of the book, and follow the adventures of Little Penis as he goes swimming (poor shrinking Penis!); gets out of bed early, so big and tall; gets a gentle kiss and hug (along with a good hard tug); head to a bar, gets drunk, and hooks up; and more—getting bigger and bigger with the turn of each page. Sometimes he’s up and sometimes he’s down, but there’s a happy ending as he finds his snug, warm place called home!

The Ugly

Author: Alexander Boldizar
ISBN: 1936767473
Release Date: 2016-09-07
Genre: Africa

"An adventure, coming-of-age novel that documents two parallel-running stories, past and present, of one individual, Muzhduk the Ugli the Fourth. In the first story, a boulder-throwing mountain man from Siberia whose land is stolen by American lawyers goes to Harvard Law School to learn how to throw words; in the second, Muzhduk has traveled to Africa to search for a lover who may be a humanitarian aid worker on a well-digging mission, or a terrorist" --