Hundreds of silly jokes on every topic you can think of! What's the difference between an elephant and a biscuit? You can't dunk an elephant in your tea. Why did the monster get good marks in his exam? Because two heads are better than one. What do you call a woman with a tortoise on her head? Shelley.
Enchanting, timeless children's classics by A.A. MilneRobert Louis Stevenson and more. Includes "The Owl and the Pussy Cat", "The Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat", "Wynken, Blynken and Nod", as well as other beloved favorites.
An enormous collection of some of the silliest jokes around, including hundreds of silly jokes on every topic imaginable!What's the difference between an elephant and a biscuit? You can't dunk an elephant in your tea. Why did the monster get good marks in his exam? Because two heads are better than one. What do you call a woman with a tortoise on her head? Shelley.
Author: Tim Vine
Release Date: 2013
Genre: English wit and humor
Comedian and TV star Tim Vine delivers a jam-packed, laugh-a-minute assortment of hilarious silliness. Welcome to THE TIM VINE BUMPER BOOK OF SILLINESS. Put your 3D glasses on now. And then remove them because they won't make any difference. This is a bit like an annual. Annual love it. It's filled with silly jokes, daft quizzes, zany pictures and other silly stuff too. We live in a very serious world but now and again it's good to forget about that and say things like 'lozenge waffle' or 'giraffe sprocket'. Ideally to a stranger.
*** WARNING - ADULT CONTENT, NOT FOR KIDS *** Adult Joke BookLooking for some adult fun to spice up your next night out? This bumper book of only the very best hand-picked adult dirty jokes will make sure you're the life of the party! All types of adult jokes are covered, including: - Dirty jokes - Sex jokes - Yo mama jokes - Blonde jokes - Wife jokes - Knock knock jokes .... and more! All the disgustingly dirty jokes are short, which means they're easy to remember so you can bust some out at a moment's notice! (And after a few beers, everyone's attention span is somewhat shorter). You'll cringe and you'll laugh at some of the rudest, crudest and LEWDEST adult jokes on the planet (that we're allowed to publish anyway!). So grab The Ultimate Adults Only Joke Book today and feel downright dirty tomorrow. Tags: funny jokes, funny, dirty jokes, sex jokes, joke, blonde jokes, adults only, dirty jokes for adults, joke book, funny joke books, funny dirty jokes, sex jokes, silly jokes, ebook, ebooks, jokes, funny, kindle joke books, funny jokes, book, comedy, lol, jokes, funny, jokes
A hilariously funny book containing hundreds of jokes on every subject under the sun, as well as the favourite jokes of famous celebrities. All royalties will be going to the Jeans for Genes Appeal in association with Great Ormond Street Children's Hospital. The appeal funds research into genetic disorders in children. A Jeans for Genes Day is held every year when people are invited to wear their jeans for a £1 donation.
What's got big ears, a tale and squeaks when you blow into it? A Mouse Organ. Mr Krispell's Kids Joke Book contains hundreds of new jokes, classic jokes and hilariously daft poems. Every page is fully illustrated with wonderfully silly drawings for children age 6 to 99 years of age. If you're looking for a classic children's joke book that parents will also enjoy, this book will not disappoint.
Author: Tim Vine
Publisher: Random House
Release Date: 2010-09-30
The irrepressible, hysterical, puntastical Tim Vine, star of stage and screen, treats all of us here in his first joke book. Packed full of zingers and hilarious illustrations, if this doesn't put a smile on your face, nothing will. What's not to like: The other day someone left a piece of plasticine in my dressing room. I didn't know what to make of it. I'm against hunting. I'm actually a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one. Black holes. I don't know what people see in them. So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, 'Nearest the bull goes first.' He went 'Baah' and I went 'Moo'. He said 'You're closest.' Velcro. What a rip-off. Black Beauty. He's a dark horse. I've got a sponge front door. Hey, don't knock it.
It’s the mother of all kids’ joke books—an all-encompassing, gut-busting, and bestselling collection of more than 1,700 jokes, tongue-twisters, riddles, and puns for all occasions. Here are 61 elephant jokes, including: What did the elephant say when he walked into the post office? / Ouch! Dozens of knock-knock jokes, like: Knock-knock. / Who’s there? / Doris. / Doris who? / Doris locked. That’s why I knocked! Plus teacher jokes and creature jokes, doctor jokes and robber jokes, food jokes, gross jokes, why-did-the-chicken-cross-the-road jokes, and name-game jokes: What do you call a man in a tiger’s cage? / Claude. And for all aspiring comedians, there are joke-telling pointers and tips, funny facts, and spotlights on comic TV shows, books, and actors, from Steve Carell to Tina Fey to SpongeBob Squarepants. It’s the ultimate gift for the incurable jokester.
Author: Peter Hepplewhite
Publisher: Pan Macmillan
Release Date: 2005
Genre: English wit and humor
A bumper book bursting with jokes, anecdotes, insults, activities and silly verses about school life. Laugh your itchy, grey regulation socks off at vile canteen meals, playground mayhem, beastly bullies and terrible teachers! Pupil: There's a dead fly in my soup! Dinner lady: What do you expect in school dinners? A live one?! Q: Why did the art teacher take a pencil to bed? A: Because she wanted to draw the curtains.
Author: Kaye Umansky
Publisher: Puffin Books
Release Date: 2004
Genre: English wit and humor
What do you get if you blow warm air down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies! What do you call a gorilla with two bananas in his ears? Anything you like, because he can't hear you! If you love telling jokes to your friends and family, here are sixty jokes just for you. They are easy to read and easy to remember, with really funny pictures to get you giggling!
Author: Harry Hill
Publisher: Faber & Faber
Release Date: 2011-10-20
Genre: Juvenile Nonfiction
Another treat for Harry Hill fans! Britain's favourite comedian, Harry Hill, loves it when people make silly mistakes. So much that he has put together a rib-tickling book of howlers, wacky stories and bloopers for all the family. The Bumper Book of Bloopers contains Harry's favourite goofs picked from the world's daftest newspapers and magazines - and believe it or not every single one of them is a genuine boob!
A treasury of irreverent, politically incorrect, and wholly distasteful jokes represents top-selected submissions to the b3ta.com Web site, in a volume that is complemented by equally biting illustrations. Original.
It used to be that when someone spilled hot coffee on their lap, they called themselves clumsy. Nowadays, they call a lawyer. America's win-the-legal-lottery mentality is humorously presented in Whiplash!, a compendium of the most outrageous real-life lawsuits ever concocted by greedy, legal minds.Whiplash! is guilty of humor targeting a court system out of control. Guided by legal sleazeball Tony Buttafony, Esq., chapter one: Lawsuits Made Easy hilariously demonstrates the finer points of spilling hot coffee on your lap and other techniques for cashing in, in court. The book also boasts the funniest legal jokes, most outrageous lawyer license plates, a legalese dictionary, and, of course, a caseload of comical lawsuits. You'll be the judge as you read true cases like the couple who sued after getting hit by a train while having sex on a subway track, or the man who sued a stripper after getting hit in the head by her breasts, and the criminal who sued his warden for a bad haircut. Whiplash! is fairly divided into twelve chapters that include ludicrous lawsuits about sex, medicine, advertising, sports, and celebrities. A great gift for law students and for the rest of us who have been waiting for a book that targets people we love to hate-lawyers!
SILLY JOKES FOR SILLY KIDS is a children's joke book containing HUNDREDS of funny kids' jokes with illustrations. The illustrations provide a visual aid to children who may become quickly tired of simply reading line after line. Kids will be laughing and sharing silly jokes with everyone in no time! Great for early readers! Be warned, some of these jokes are really, really, really silly. So silly, in fact, it is hard not to laugh!